Wow!  It’s been a months since I updated because I really haven’t been feeling the whole “natural hair thing” much lately.  All the pomp and circumstance and ceremony and making life revolve around products and styling just became too much to want to deal with.  And the energy in some of the “communities” is just draining with the on going debates of what is natural and what isn’t or who is more natural than who and the cult-like following of what celebs are jumping on the natural bandwagon.  We all “go natural” for our own reasons, and I don’t want to be the one to say one person’s motivation is more “worthy” of note than another’s but… Well… I didn’t want to be a part of the superficiality of it all.  My life is about more than just the kinky mop that sits atop my head and I was ready to break out of the box.  In tandem with that, I really wasn’t feeling as if I was paid much attention to anyway, outside of a handful of my nappy peers (yeah I’m looking at you Sistah Chick, Chele, Njemile, Laquita, Dawn and Jaye!) so I figured i wouldn’t “waste” the energy anymore.  Of course those aren’t the only reasons for my “break”.  There were more than a few pressing personal matters that needed my full attention more than this Blog or my Examiner column did, so I had to step away.  And that meant stepping away from all aspects of the phenomenon, including Twitter, the Napturalite Radio Community and Facebook.  Even my Email account was getting the shaft.  I just didn’t want to deal with it anymore.

But a funny thing seems to always happen when I want to step away.  A random reader contacts me with “news” that makes it all worthwhile again.  I’d gotten a notion to check my Email to see if anything inspiring had floated my way and indeed it had, in the form of a reader writing to let me know that JB2M was featured as one of Spa Beauty Schools’ Top 50 Hair Blogs.  In addition to that, Mireille Liong-A-Kong had contacted me about a paid opportunity to contribute to Going Natural Magazine.  Kinda gave me a Michael Corleone type sensation but both Emails where just the perk-me-up I needed to become motivated again.  Seems the Universe is reminding me that I do have something worthy to contribute amidst the natural hair madness and there are people out there who look forward to it.  Even if I never really see it.  So I guess that means I gotta pick up the virtual pen again and get back in the swing of things, which I will do with pleasure!

So what’s been up with me lately?  Well… As you can tell from the above pic my hair is almost back to pre-BC length, which I would have never realized had I not had the inclination to press it a couple of days ago.  That there is ~5’of new growth from the ~1’ in started with back in September of ‘09, and ~2’ from where I was in February of this year:

All together I’m looking at ~6’ from root to tip all the way around.  This discovery actually shocked me because I had no idea I’d gained that much growth in such a “short” span of time.  On average, hair growth at a rate of 1/4’ per month so the gain proves my hair grows way faster than average.  I’ve had people comment that my hair grows fast, to which I pretty much said “peeshaw”. *lol* But to actually see it with my own eyes is utterly amazing!  And to think, I was on the cusp of performing another BC because my growth had changed the “pattern” of my curls and WNG’s weren’t working as well for me anymore.  As much as I don’t like to do the “heat” thing, I’m glad I gave in to the urge to press my hair or I may have never really known how much was up there. *lol* My routine has stayed pretty much consistent with me alternating avocado-coconut milk conditioner washes with shampoo’ing and conditioning using Kinky-Curly’s Come Clean and Knot Today, spritzing every morning with water and Yonnea’s Natural Beauty’s Honey Hibiscus Leave N Condish and finger styling with a bit of Going-Natural’s Silky Shea Aloe Butter.  Every now and again (maybe once every other week) I’d oil my hair with Yonnea’s Natural Beauty’s GPS Oil (review coming soon) and smooth my edges down with Going-Natural’s Herbal Styling Gel, but other than that I’ve pretty much kept my product usage to a bare minimum.  The only time I applied heat to my hair were on the two occasions documented in the pictures here and my style has been WNG’s.  I really haven’t trimmed my ends very much at all since doing the BC but did so when I pressed my hair both times and I have experienced very little shedding (well, no more than usual) and absolutely NO split ends.  Can’t really say any of this was a magic combination or anything but I can say a key element was keeping my hands out of my hair as much as possible. *lol*

So it’s almost been a year and I can honestly say the whole process was enlightening.  In the past ten and three quarter months I have learned what my hair likes, doesn’t like, how it grows, my curl pattern and what products work as it grows.  I’ve also learned a lot about myself and my perception of beauty which dispelled a lot of myths in the “long hair signifies femininity” department.  So it’s been an experience in self discovery from the inside out and I’m glad I mustered up the courage to undertake it.  It is a leg of the journey I highly recommend if you are so inclined.

What’s on the horizon for my natural hair “career”?  Well along with the features I plan to do, I still need to do a review of Chris-Tia Donaldson’s “Thank God I’m Natural” as well as a review for Lori Johnson’s “A Natural Woman”.  For my Examiner column I have an article featuring Minister Theresa Cloud Eagle’s Divine Essentials® Aromatherapy & Empowerment Tools on deck, will be covering the Nappturally Me Meetup Group’s one year anniversary as well as changing of name (they are now known as Ohio Naturals) format and organizers, can hopefully start an article about the Natural Sistas in Ohio Meetup Group, and just maybe, now that I have a job and can afford to see a stylist, can produce an article about the Synergi Salon experience.  I also may be revamping the Blog’s look and Twitter page as well as the CNHE Facebook Page.  So there’s big things in the works and I hope you all stick around for it all!

Healthy Hair Wishes!

Healthy Hair Wishes!

Yes I know it’s been a minute.  Life had taken a upswing in the activity department so I wasn’t able to be online as much.  I started school and a work assignment in the same week so time was kinda constrained for personal endeavours.  At any rate, the work assignment ended so now I’m able to devout more time to my Blogs and CNHE column, which is a good thing since I’m much rather make a living doing what I love.

So anyway, what’s been up with me?  Well, I’m coming to the end of my Co-Wash and Twist/Twist Out Challenge which has been an absolute wonder-filled experience for both me and my hair.  Incidentally, because of the time constraints I was under it turned into a co-wash and wash out challenge which proved to be just as fun because it helped me gain a bit more confidence with wearing my hair uncovered in public which is also a good thing.  As you can see from the above picture my curls and coils are still in full effect and my hair stays full, lush and soft in between co-washes.  I slipped up Monday morning and grabbed the shampoo while I was showering, but not even that stripped the wonderful effects of moisture retention, fullness and softness that co-washing has boosted.  Think I’m gonna stick with that while my hair is short because of how it keeps my curls defined and resisting dryness.  My recommendation to those who have not tried co-washing, do it!  Even on a short term basis.  It doesn’t take two months to see the results and your hair will thank you for it.

I’m still on the Skin Care Challenge track, although not as diligently do to my cramped schedule, but that is due to change now.  Honestly, I have noticed a BIG difference in between my skin’s condition when I was washing every other day and masking once a week and when I was lackadaisically washing and masking whenever I remembered to.  The dry patches on my cheeks are not as dry as they once were but now it seems my entire face “oozes” with oil if I go too far without washing.  The one good thing about my work/school schedule during the challenge was it allowed me to stay hydrated during the day because I stayed with a bottle of SmartWater of Sobe Life Water, so that was a benefit.  But now that I’m home and only attending classes during the week on Monday and Wednesday nights, I haven’t been keeping up with the hydration like I should.  The Lion, who has been trying to step his hydration game up as well, went out and purchased a couple of boxes of the Crystal Light-like water flavour packet thingies which I might start dipping into in order to bring my water intake back to positive levels (I can not stand the “taste” of plain water, ya’ll.  Especially Ohio water.  Ick!) and get back on track.

I took a week or two off due to some “technical difficulties” over at Examiner.com but I’m now back publishing articles on my regular thrice weekly schedule and it feels GREAT!  I want to thank everyone who’s popped over or shared a link to one of the articles and want to ask that you keep up the readership!  The giveaway hasn’t gone so great since there have been absolutely no entries to date.  I plan to bring it to a close tomorrow if no one takes the bait, and that’s cool with me.  At least I got some great products out of the effort.  Future articles that I have planned will touch on the topics of what exactly makes Black hair so political, natural hair in the workplace from the employer’s perspective and shed the spotlight on some little known Columbus natural hair resources like Synergi Salon‘s “Get It Strait” Workshops, Divine Essential hair care line and natural hair stylist, Dairdre Scriven.

What’s coming up on the JB2M horizon?  Well I was invited to be a writer for Going Natural Magazine, and for compensation the lovely Drs. Mireille Liong-A-Kong has gifted me a copy of her book, “Going Natural: How to Fall in Love with Nappy Hair“, along with a jar of Silk Shea Aloe Butter and Herbal Natural Styling Gel, all of which I will be reviewing on next week.  I will also be reviewing M. Michele George‘s “The Knotty Truth“ and Chris-Tia Donaldson‘s “Thank God I’m Natural“ very, very soon.  Product-wise, I never received my Aveeno samples but I did pick up two trial size bottles of Avalon Organics Lavender Nourishing Shampoo and Conditioner that I want to try on for size and I had a lovely experience with Yonnea’s Natural Beauty‘s Honey Hibiscus Leave N Condish that I want to share.  And last but not least I’ll be featuring the hair journey of Sherita Daniels, the picturesque founder of the Perfectly Pretty Beauty Blog, in the beginning of the week.

So yeah, there’s a lot in store for you all both here and over at the CNHE column so stay tuned and check back in often.

Healthy Hair Wishes!

Here we are at the end of week two and seriously I am LOVING this cowash thing!  Seriously, my hair has not been this fabulous since… Well, since birth, I suspect. *lol*  It is lush and full, it is SOFT, it is well moisturized and it has a glorious sheen to it. And coils?  Fuggedaboutit!  As you can see from last week’s pictures, the curls were on and popping!  Of course there’s still the “over” oiliness that comes with me having used so much oil in my conditioner recipe, but by that evening it had soaked in nicely.  The upside to using the amount of oil I used is that during the week, since I was rocking two strands, I don’t have apply any extra moisturizing product.  Gotta love that.

As an experiment, I decided to cowash The Lion‘s hair to see if I could duplicate my results and you know what?  GLO-RI-OUS!

I often have an issue with getting his fro to form perfectly, but after the cowash this was not a problem at all.  And to revive the shape after he’s slept on it all night?  Simply spritz with water, finger pick, and he’s back looking like he just stepped out of a 70s Blaxplotation flick. *lol*  So I’m loving this regimen all the way around!  Of course, because he’s a guy he kanye shrugged the whole process, but I was ecstatic.

Okay, back to me. *lol* As for differences in the condition of my hair and scalp, my hair does feel stronger, smoother and my ends less ragged.  Scalp-wise, I suffered from extreme itchy scalp for awhile — possibly due to the many years of relaxer exposure — and after two weeks of just cowashing the itch has lessened a whoooooooooooole lot.  This may also be due to the fact that my scalp is no longer being “stripped” of its oils by shampoos and the oils I use are encouraging sebum production.  I’m not a cosmetologist or dermatologist so I’m only guessing, but the difference is noticeable.  There’s also less flaking going on which is wonderful on many levels.

As for the twist/twist out part of the challenge, I twisted my hair shortly after my last update and kept them in until it was time to cowash again (I was really unwilling to take them down so soon but wanted to keep up with the process), and rocked the twist out to work.  No comments from coworkers but I was pleased with the results (the top pic is the result, which isn’t much different than last week… I need to get some new accessories. *lol*) This coming week I will probably only leave the twists in over the weekend and wear a twist out the rest of the week to see what the response is.

So there it is.  Going into week three and I’m really having a grand old time with this challenge.  Five more weeks to go, and possibly a trim come week four.  I’ll be sure to keep you updated.

Whether you are doing just the cowash part or engaging in the full monty I’d love to hear your results here in the comment, via twitter at @jb2me or via Email at amichelle@journeyback2me.com.

Healthy Hair Wishes,

Well here I am at the beginning of week two of my challenge and let me tell you… I am in LOVE with my results!  Well… on the co-wash side, since I have yet to twist my hair (which I’m scheduled to do tonight… I think. *lol*) because I loved my washout outcome so much.

It has been a week since I started this challenge and honestly, I have to say the results have been remarkable.  I’ve often heard many people say that co-washes leave their hair feeling greasy and unclean I have not had that experience so far.  For me, my hair feels cleaner than when I used shampoo, if that’s possible!  This might be because I use a homemade conditioner that incorporates four different oils and shea butter so I did not have to add add extra oil for moisture once my hair dried, or it might be the ACV rinse and tepid water rinse. *kanye shrug*  Either way, my hair was lush, full of body and ever so moisture rich without feeling heavy.  I don’t think I’ll ever go back to shampoo for cleansing again!  Okay so, not really but the results are to be desired.

After the final rinse my coils were well defined, soft and full of life.  Since I detangled while the I “washed” I came away with absolutely no kinks whatsoever.  The above picture is of my crown while partially damp, full and fluffy and coily.   Even after my hair dried my kinks were minimal and my hair was still soft.  Here’s a closer view:

Note: Admittedly, while my hair was wet my hair was oily to the touch, which isn’t a big thing for me since I work from home (for the moment) and can allow it to soak in as my hair air dries.  This can be avoided by decreasing the amount of oils used or eliminating the shea butter.  The excess oil soaked into my hair by the next day, leaving behind a nice sheen and accounting for the soft, supple feel of my hair.

Scalp wise, I did not experience the same amount of buildup or dryness as I had when using my usual Garnier shampoo and conditioner duo.  This seemed kind of odd to me since the co-washing process doesn’t leave hair “product free” like shampoo is supposed to.  I guess this could be due to there being no chemical preservatives in my conditioner of choice. *kanye shrug reloaded*

Since I wore a wash out for the entire first week the one thing that was a constant concern was shrinkage and how to refresh my style after sleeping on it all night.  Well all it took to pop my style back into effect was a few spritzes of water from my trusty spray bottle and a few run-throughs of my fingers and I was good to go.  The water worked to reactivate the oils already in my hair thanks to the conditioner, so extra added products were not necessary, although I did use a bit of Going-Natural’s Silky Shea-Aloe Butter that I won from Afroglitz Mag‘s giveaway a couple weeks ago to “smooth” my edges (Thanks again!).  This was my week-long style, in a nutshell:

So in conclusion, I am loving the challenge so far and how it leaves my hair feeling nourished and full and curly. I also love the fact that I did not have to use additional products to keep my hair from feeling dry in the week between washing and it has improved my washout success!  I haven’t noticed any growth or strength differences as yet, but I’m sure that won’t be noticeable until at least update four.

Did you take up the challenge too?  Whether you are doing just the cowash part or engaging in the full monty I’d love to hear your results here in the comment, via twitter at @jb2me or via Email at amichelle@journeyback2me.com.  Maybe next week I’ll have more on the twist/twist out side of the challenge to speak of. *lol*

**ADDENDUM**

I actually twisted my hair!!!

Okay so, they aren’t much to speak of since I wear them wrapped up most of the time, but at least I did get that part of the challenge met this week. *lol*

Healthy Hair Wishes,

Since it seems er’body and their momma is throwing down challenges with their hair and skin care regimens, I figured I’d throw one down too and set a two month co-wash and twist gauntlet for myself. With all the hulabaloo concerning the harshness of commercial products (shampoos in particular), as much as I love my Garnier Fructis Wonder Wave combo (which I do have a review for, later)  I decided to give it a rest for awhile and see how my hair would fair with just homemade products.

Since I’d bought three avocados a couple of weeks ago and didn’t want them to spoil, plus having written so many articles on homemade hair care implements that could be used in place of commercial products, today I whipped up a batch of my favourite avocado-coconut milk conditioner (with a few choice additions) and decided it would be my cleanser/conditioner of choice for the next two months.  The recipe is as follows:

3 avocados

1 1/2 cup of coconut milk

1/4 cup of olive, sweet almond, coconut and grapeseed oils (combined, not each)

1/4 cup of honey

1/2 tsp of shea butter

1/2 tsp of sage

Mash the avocado with a potato masher until the avocado is nice and mushed.  Add to blender or food processor along with the other ingredients and blend until it’s nice and smooth; the consistency of a commercial conditioner.  Slather on hair after a warm (not hot) water rinse, cover with a plastic grocery bag (reduce, reuse, recycle) and allow to sit on hair for one half hour to an hour.  Rinse away with cold or tepid water.

Now you may enlist the aid of a hood dryer to give your hair a deep condition treatment if you like, but it’s not necessary.

Where does the twist part come in?  Well, because I am absosmurfly in L-O-V-E with my twist outs now that my hair is short (can you say curl definition for days), and I’m really concerned with the condition of my ends here lately (they feel horrid because I have not trimmed since my BC) I wanted to work with a protective style consistently for awhile to see if it makes any difference. So today, after I’m done with my leisure conditioning treatment, I am going to two-strand twist my tresses and leave them in until Sunday, then rock a twist out for the time that I’m at my work assignment.  The point of the twist out is, to boost my confidence with wearing my natural hair free of my signature bun wraps which aren’t really “bad” for my hair but do keep me in the state of being “ashamed” of showing my natural hair.

NOTE: I am not ashamed of my hair, just not confident in carrying off certain styles.

So here we go.  Starting today no shampoo just my homemade conditioner and two-strands and twist outs as my style.  Let’s see how long I last.

If you want to take up the challenge just comment on this post, send me a tweet me at @jb2me or email at ammichelle@journeyback2me.com and let me know.  I’m interested to see both your progress and mine.

Healthy Hair Wishes,

It has been almost seven complete months since I daringly took a pair of shears to my eight inch tresses and, out of frustration, snipped close to six inches.  This wasn’t done out of frustration with my hair, but with how things were going in my life up to that point.  What’s the correlation?  Well I’m a big believer in the idea that hair is infused with the energy of your life experiences, and for the past three years a lot of my experiences had been negatively charged.  After an extremely stress-filled visit to Detroit I arrived home and without thinking chopped off my hair at its two ample puffs.  It was such a rash decision it took me about two weeks to be able to look in a mirror.

Well last month I decided to lightly press my hair, not anticipating any real results growth-wise, and this is what I came away with:

That’s looking at approximately three inches on top of approximately one inch to start.  How did I do it?  With a very basic hair care premise called keeping my hands out of it, coupled with weekly conditioning, bi-weekly shampoo’ing and daily moisturizing with a blend of coconut, sweet almond, and grapeseed oils.  Nope, nothing fancy or intricate beyond one or two deep conditioning treatments with my Avocado-Coconut Milk-Honey-Sage conditioner.

Now if this seems miraculous to you consider this: Under normal, healthy condition ALL hair grows an average one half of an inch each month.  So by keeping manipulation and heat usage low, never combing through my hair when it was dry and allowing it to do what it does best, I was able to retain every half inch of growth these seven months yielded.  This is even accounting for natural shedding, which has increased thanks to Columbus’ hard water issues.

To date I have only ventured two styles with my short cut.  A weirdly funky two strand twist that a wrapped too early so the twists flattened:

And this weird, funky twists result turned into this absolutely GORGEOUS twist out fro:

Both styles were attempted this month.  I plan to do another two-strand attempt this week in preparation for my NEW JOB ASSIGNMENT  (*wild applause*) so that I can rock that curly twist out again.  Oh yeah… I hit a new milestone.  While I was in Detroit I actually went outside in the world with my hair uncovered!  Yes.  If you read my post about long vs. short hair then you know my trepidations about wearing my hair in public.  Well that’s a thing of the past now that I’ve found my “signature” short style.

So, there’s my hair update, which I know are painfully far and few between. *lol* I’m still flirting with the idea of locs but I think I want to gain a few more inches before I take the plunge.  Maybe come winter I’ll be ready.

Healthy Hair Wishes,

I have been working my petite patootie off researching topics for JB2M, Examiner.com and my natural hair book project.  Working so hard, in fact, I have totally knocked myself off my hair care square!  Since chopping my locks back in September I have grown real lax in my maintenance routine.  Beyond washing, conditioning and dousing it with coconut, grapeseed or sweet almond oil every other day, I have neglected my hair in the worst way.  I’m surprised that it hasn’t jumped up and left me behind my ignoring it. *lol*

One would think that after being on the journey as long as I have there would be very little to learn about the strands that span across my scalp.  After three years I have my product arsenal on lock, I know my curl pattern and I know how my hair reacts to the various seasons.  In the time that I’ve been natural, I’ve had the opportunity to know without question what my hair likes and dislikes and how to get the best out of my natural experience on a mind, body and soul level.  While it might seem logical that by now there’d be no more miles to travel hair wise, realistically there are still many, many more ahead of me as I learn to keep my cropped curls healthy and growing.

Since I’ve never had to deal with my hair this short while natural, I’ve been getting a crash course in just how coiled my coils are and the difference that makes when it comes to styling and maintenance.  I find that while it take less oil to keep my hair properly moisturized now, I have to use it more often than I did when it was long (haven’t figured out why yet, but that’s coming).  In a discovery that wasn’t exactly an exercise in rocket science, I learned that while my styling options are limited to twists or fro, even those styles take on a different execution than when my hair was longer.   Fact is, my short natural hair has a totally different personality than my long natural hair, and with that comes a whole new process of learning.  But alas, with all the virtual ripping and running I’ve been doing over the past couple of months, I really haven’t made time to give my hair more than a cursory glance.  Well that ends today!

Now that all my work is done for the upcoming week, I’ve done my domestic moving and shaking as per my Sunday ritual, today my tresses will get a bit of VIP treatment.  I picked up some fresh avocados and a can of coconut milk from the Walmart earlier and will treat my hair to a deep tropical conditioning and a hot olive oil treatment.  Once my stands are all clean and fed and loved up on, I’ll twist it up, cover it up and let it rest for a few days.  I’m going to keep up with my bi-weekly cleansing and conditioning, but in the mean time and in between time I’ll take more of an effort to give my hair the QT it deserves to keep my hair fro’ing and growing.

So today is the the restart of my TLC treatment when it comes to my hair and getting back to the foundation my started the Blog, my Examiner.com column and other natural endeavours… my actual, natural hair.

Healthy Hair Wishes,

Can you believe it?  Almost three whole years relaxer free?  Me either!  When I announced the news via Twitter, Pegasus Soap‘s owner, Michelle Ortiz, asked how it’s going for me.  My reply was simply that it’s been a unique experience.  But after thinking on it a couple minutes I realized that up until she asked I’d never given much thought.  I mean, I’m aware of my hair every moment of the day in one way or another.  Whether I’m twirling it around my fingers while considering what topics to Blog about or twisting it around itself to help define my natural curls, my hair is a constant consideration.  But in a latent sort of way.  Realistically, while I take relatively good care of my hair and love every kink and coil that comprises it, it is often “background noise” for me as I move through my days.  For the most part, it’s just “there.”  I’m not a natural style maven or avid product experimenter.  I don’t provide tutorials or combine my journey with other elements of fashion or beauty.  I simply live and allow my hair to do the same.

Looking back, despite my “ignoring” it all these years, I can truthfully say that as my hair has grown so have I.  I’ve grown in prospective, understanding and acceptance.  Not just about my hair and myself, but about  the world my hair and I live in as well.  I’ve wrestled insecurities and inner prejudices that I was totally unaware existed.  I can’t say that I’ve conquered them all, but I grow stronger with each victory, no matter how small it may be.  I’ve seen through the hype of natural hair politics and into an appreciation for everyone’s right to wear their hair how they see fit.  I’ve broken myself out of accepted comfort zones and conforming “rituals”, rendered myself vulnerable and finally gotten to a point in life where I feel good about being me on my terms.  I’ve come from up under the impressions of what natural is supposed to be, and into defining what natural IS, from my hair, to my spiritual practices, to my compassions and social involvements.  Although I have never been overly  preoccupied with my hair itself, I have digested its subliminal every day lessons in a way that has been personally fulfilling.  And now here I am off on a new leg, learning my hair as it grows “from the ground up”, which I’m sure will be a even bigger source enrichment.

All in all, I guess my true answer is that my journey has been a wonderful and freeing experience on many levels.  Consciously, it’s helped me to appreciate myself and others as we are.  Subconsciously, it’s helped me to break down certain barriers in my perspective of beauty, be it natural or enhanced.

Here’s to three more years, and then some!

Healthy Hair Wishes,

Hello All!

Yes, it has been a minute… yet again. *lol* While part of my absence has been due to dealing with personal issues and the birth of my first grandson, a big part of it was due to my growing disenchantment with all things black hair related.  Well, not black hair itself but all of the superficial BS “politics” that are imposed on it.  The never ending “good vs. bad” debate that never dips deeper than the surface of antiquates social concepts; the collective “groupthink” perpetuation of stereotypes which keeps us locked in damaging thought patterns; having more important aspects of our heritage diminished to trivial prejudices attached to our coils.  And let’s not even get into the disunion which exists within the black hair community itself!  It’s just all really too much to deal with when much larger issues deserve much more of our attention, and so I considered scraping the Blog and the book project altogether.

But then I got to thinking… Whose journey is this, exactly?  Did I begin pursuing the napptural life to gain approval from the natural community?  No.  Was I going through the legwork of research for the book because it would make me popular?  Of course not.  Did this start off as an exercise in conformity to what others thought “going natural” should be about?  Hell no!  This journey is about me and me alone, and I am doing all of this because I wanted to, apart from all of the above chaos and protocol.  So with that realization I made the decision that I would not quit on myself, and having mastered the chemical free part of the process I figured it was time start over again… on my terms.

Because the hair part of the journey is largely symbolic of inner restructuring and I’d already done that “hard” part of rendering myself chemical free, I figured the next step was to conquer learning myself through my hair as it grew.  So after returning from a particularly stress-filled visit home, I got acquainted with my scissors and took my hair down as short as I could possibly dare to go.  As you can see from the above picture, I went from ~ 8 to 10 inches down to ~ 1 to 3, a drastic switch if I do say so myself.  Now while I have had my hair this short several times before it has always been relaxed, and even though I have close to three years natural to my credit, I am learning there is a totally different dynamic between napptural with length and napptural without it.  I’m starting from square one again, not just in dealing with the texture of my hair (which is way curlier than I’d ever anticipated) but in dealing with the  negative psychology surrounding women of colour with short natural hair as well.  Since cutting my hair I have fought back tears of regret and frustration every time I look in the mirror.  I’ve received compliments from friends, which is very inspiring… but fighting through the learned perception that long hair equates to beauty and femininity is harder than I’d thought it would be.  So again, it’s not just about the hair.  This leg of the journey is about breaking down personal prejudices, misconceptions and working through self image fears I didn’t know I had.  It’s also about accepting myself outside of what others believe defined beauty via hair, whether natural, relaxed, long or short.

So here I am, looking like a Monchhichi in my opinion, with teenie weenie corkscrews adorning my head that I can’t keep my fingers far from.  Of course, because I’m not a skilled stylist and had to do most of the cutting by feel, I will have to take the next step and visit a barber for shaping and tapering.  From there begins the process of learning my distinct curl patterns, what products help to keep them manageable and healthy, as well as educating myself on what practices promote growth.  This will be an extreme exercise in patience on my part, because while it’s easy to “ignore” growth when you already have length to work with, I know each quarter inch I gain each month will be like watching paint dry, and there will be no quick fixes to bide my time with.  Maybe, after a couple of inches, I’ll go on ahead and loc it all up, but for now I’ll make do with the hard work of growing comfortable with my TWA.

Healthy Hair Wishes,